i just did one (1) paper today. but i found some absolutely fascinating problems. this one integral which can be solved in a split second if you realize the trick
catalan numbers
they're still a bit out of reach for me but i want to learn
i really, REALLY want to learn
it's not fair that i have to put myself in a box and stay relevant when i so badly want to learn
why won't you teach me?
okay so today i opened my td notes after forever (sORRY) and then i just saw deltag=h-tds and then i read that line under it which was like useful work done
and something just CLICKED
like i underSTOOD deltag=h-tds like H MINUS T DELTA S you know like enthalpy minus that craziness
and something was right in the world
i've never ever seen delta g truly
it's like, it came out today. i see her for all she is.
h minus t ds.
babe, i'm being real with you right now, this feeling does NOT come around so often.
this YEARNING, almost, this inexplicable desire to know more, this unquenchable thirst, this insatiable appetite—
i was solving pnc today when i stumbled upon a couple of 1985 aime questions. my GOD they made me think and i loved it. i was really close to solving one of them and with a teeny-tiny hint i got there.
this stuff really gets me going.
so i went over to their website, followed a couple of links to this book which i now want.
there's something so creative about math. something i can't put my finger on but it's tasty, you know? i think that's how i want to describe it. just... like when you're doing sbt or you're going through this incho paper and this crazy logic hits you like a truck.
i can lie to myself
i can lie, and lie, and lie over and over again
but there are very few feelings in this world better than that.
it's just ME in my stupid chair in my blue room and no one knows what i'm doing and i'm not even saying anything i'm not sharing it with anyone it's just me and my thoughts and it's WEIRD.
weirdly special.
i'll leave you with this, maybe you can solve it now...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=POL9wABXBQA
this is mindblowing. i learned about the coastline paradox today, probably three years later than i should have and it is intriguing. fractals are basically shapes or figures of geometry such that the perimeter tends to infinity and the area tends to zero. or the area is basically a fixed quantity, but the line surrounding it can get as jiggly as it wants. like the coastline.
picture this, you're on mars and looking at the coastline of india. it's literally a dot. you can't even see it. as you get closer it morphs into something more triangular. you calculate it's perimeter approximately. you get even closer. you have to pick up a thread eventually, and touch it to every jagged rock or edge of the coastline. and even then you physically can't measure the exact length of the entire coastline.
it's crazy, no?
that koch snowflake is insanely gorgeous.
https://www.desmos.com/calculator/acl6xmr9as
this is even more magical. i am filled with this sudden irritatingly mind-numbing desire to LEARN. i don't know why or when or how this feeling invaded my but i want to KNOW. i desperately want to know. that mandelbrot thing is crazy crazy.
***
topics to learn:
Dynamical systems
Iteration theory
Chaos theory
Complex dynamics
i just did one (1) paper today. but i found some absolutely fascinating problems. this one integral which can be solved in a split second i...
